Sunday, 2 August 2015

Goan Connection

You must have heard about the Goan connection and specially how happy they feel upon seeing each other or even when you hear Konkani distantly. Inadvertently you walk upon to that person with this broad smile and a question...tumi goychi? :)

In our society there is a lady who has been married into Goan family....the ancestral roots are in Goa. For specific reasons, I and she have not had cordial relation. One day I was super upset with the behavior she had put up and came back home almost grumbling about it. Baba was in Pune then and when he heard the reason and entire context of my interaction with her...he asked me....Goiche bare aame aasa....haav falya wharun tika diu? Khusshi jaatli!!

It is a different note that Baba always like to give. . but this thought of his must have originated from the Goan connection. He suggestion must have been to salvage the issues with tumi goychi...aami bi concept :)

Wish issues settled on such simple exchanges and connections!!

Saturday, 1 August 2015

50th Wedding Anniversary

My Parents will be celebrating their 50th Wedding Anniversary on 4th July 15! 50 years of marriage..of togetherness..of highs and lows and so many incidents, circumstances that they might have rejoiced or overcome.

I had this wish that I would see my parents get re-married, since we had missed it the first time :) But when I proposed this idea to them they were dead against it. They both dont want any formal celebration and rather after lot of coaxing my mother said we will celebrate by going some place in the vacation kids will have! Really? Since then I have been wondering what must have been their thought process? If I was nearing my 50th anniversary, I would have loved to celebrate in many ways than one. But perhaps by the time you get that age, the wishes fade out is it? Your health perhaps play a spoil sport?

Ubha & Aadwa Tilak pratha


Tilak is worn on the Ajna Chakra, the center of forehead, on the space between the eyebrows. Tilak is applied on the point at which the third eye or the spiritual eye is believed to open. All the actions of humans are governed by this specific point. Application of tilak is customary and infact, most of the Hindu ceremonies begin with the application of tilak. Well, Tilak can be made by using sandal paste, turmeric, kumkum or ashes. Depending on the purpose for which Tilak is applied, the material is chosen for preparing the sacred forehead mark.
  • Sandal: White sandal symbolizes purity, calmness and tranquility
  • Kumkum: Red kumkum signifies power, vigor, dynamism and stability
  • Turmeric: Saffron colored turmeric stands for wealth, fortune, prosperity and opulence
  • Holy Ashes or Vibhuti: Vibhuti represents dedication, devotion and commitment
Usually a tilak is made of freshly grinded sandal paste mixed with vermilion and turmeric as per Shastric injunctions. Numerous mentions have been made about Tilak in the ancient scriptures such as Vedas and Upanishads. Rig Veda has given an elaborate description about the life of Goddess Usha, the consort of Lord Surya. She is portrayed as wearing a red dot [Bindi] on her forehead that signifies the rising sun. Tilak is an elongated form of Bindi and takes on various forms but all the forms honor the central dot.
In earlier times, the four castes (based on varna or colour) – Brahmana, Kshatriya, Vaishya and Sudra – applied marks differently. The brahmin applied a white chandan mark signifying purity, as his profession was of a priestly or academic nature. The kshatriya applied a red kumkum mark signifying valor as he belonged to warrior races. The vaishya wore a yellow kesar or turmeric mark signifying prosperity as he was a businessman or trader devoted to creation of wealth. The sudra applied a black bhasma, kasturi or charcoal mark signifying service as he supported the work of the other three divisions. Also Vishnu worshippers apply a chandan tilak of the shape of "U", Shiva worshippers a tripundra, Devi worshippers a red dot of kumkum and so on).
Its form and color vary according to one's caste, religious sect or the form of the Lord worshipped. 

There are different types of Tilak, each differing in its significance. Tilak can be applied in varied forms as a mark of auspiciousness as well as blessing. Tilak does not have single standard form and is applied differently by members affiliated with different sects and subsects. The most common form is a dot or a dot with a long vertical extension and is worn by those not affiliated with any particular sect.

In India the perpendicular Tilak distinguishes the adorer of the Preserver, from the worshipper of the Destroyer. Worshippers of Lord Vishnu, known as Vaishnavas, wear a vertical V or U shaped tilak known as Urdhavapundra, using ash (vibhuti), clay or sandalwood paste. This is a sign of preservation or protection. Worshippers of Lord Shiva, known as Saivites draw three horizontal stripes joining at corners (Tripundra) with vibhuti or sandalwood paste anda red dot between the eyebrows. This is as a reminder of God’s three-fold nature of creator, preserver, and destroyer.

Is personal expression acceptable in public

Many times I come across this in office..lift...cafeteria..theatre..malls. People are talking on phone and before disconnecting the phone..they will say things like "I love you" " I miss you" so on and so forth. How do we look at this scenario? Is it appropriate to say this publicly? Not loud but enough for  the person standing next to you to hear it.

I am unable to decide. On one hand it is personal between 2 people and it need not be made so explicit. I am sure the involved parties know their feelings for each other. On other hand, it is individual choice. You are saying this in your own space. Why should it bother anyone ? He or she is not disturbing you, then why would you want to think about it?

Will like to hear more thoughts on this...