Sunday, 2 August 2015

Goan Connection

You must have heard about the Goan connection and specially how happy they feel upon seeing each other or even when you hear Konkani distantly. Inadvertently you walk upon to that person with this broad smile and a question...tumi goychi? :)

In our society there is a lady who has been married into Goan family....the ancestral roots are in Goa. For specific reasons, I and she have not had cordial relation. One day I was super upset with the behavior she had put up and came back home almost grumbling about it. Baba was in Pune then and when he heard the reason and entire context of my interaction with her...he asked me....Goiche bare aame aasa....haav falya wharun tika diu? Khusshi jaatli!!

It is a different note that Baba always like to give. . but this thought of his must have originated from the Goan connection. He suggestion must have been to salvage the issues with tumi goychi...aami bi concept :)

Wish issues settled on such simple exchanges and connections!!

Saturday, 1 August 2015

50th Wedding Anniversary

My Parents will be celebrating their 50th Wedding Anniversary on 4th July 15! 50 years of marriage..of togetherness..of highs and lows and so many incidents, circumstances that they might have rejoiced or overcome.

I had this wish that I would see my parents get re-married, since we had missed it the first time :) But when I proposed this idea to them they were dead against it. They both dont want any formal celebration and rather after lot of coaxing my mother said we will celebrate by going some place in the vacation kids will have! Really? Since then I have been wondering what must have been their thought process? If I was nearing my 50th anniversary, I would have loved to celebrate in many ways than one. But perhaps by the time you get that age, the wishes fade out is it? Your health perhaps play a spoil sport?

Ubha & Aadwa Tilak pratha


Tilak is worn on the Ajna Chakra, the center of forehead, on the space between the eyebrows. Tilak is applied on the point at which the third eye or the spiritual eye is believed to open. All the actions of humans are governed by this specific point. Application of tilak is customary and infact, most of the Hindu ceremonies begin with the application of tilak. Well, Tilak can be made by using sandal paste, turmeric, kumkum or ashes. Depending on the purpose for which Tilak is applied, the material is chosen for preparing the sacred forehead mark.
  • Sandal: White sandal symbolizes purity, calmness and tranquility
  • Kumkum: Red kumkum signifies power, vigor, dynamism and stability
  • Turmeric: Saffron colored turmeric stands for wealth, fortune, prosperity and opulence
  • Holy Ashes or Vibhuti: Vibhuti represents dedication, devotion and commitment
Usually a tilak is made of freshly grinded sandal paste mixed with vermilion and turmeric as per Shastric injunctions. Numerous mentions have been made about Tilak in the ancient scriptures such as Vedas and Upanishads. Rig Veda has given an elaborate description about the life of Goddess Usha, the consort of Lord Surya. She is portrayed as wearing a red dot [Bindi] on her forehead that signifies the rising sun. Tilak is an elongated form of Bindi and takes on various forms but all the forms honor the central dot.
In earlier times, the four castes (based on varna or colour) – Brahmana, Kshatriya, Vaishya and Sudra – applied marks differently. The brahmin applied a white chandan mark signifying purity, as his profession was of a priestly or academic nature. The kshatriya applied a red kumkum mark signifying valor as he belonged to warrior races. The vaishya wore a yellow kesar or turmeric mark signifying prosperity as he was a businessman or trader devoted to creation of wealth. The sudra applied a black bhasma, kasturi or charcoal mark signifying service as he supported the work of the other three divisions. Also Vishnu worshippers apply a chandan tilak of the shape of "U", Shiva worshippers a tripundra, Devi worshippers a red dot of kumkum and so on).
Its form and color vary according to one's caste, religious sect or the form of the Lord worshipped. 

There are different types of Tilak, each differing in its significance. Tilak can be applied in varied forms as a mark of auspiciousness as well as blessing. Tilak does not have single standard form and is applied differently by members affiliated with different sects and subsects. The most common form is a dot or a dot with a long vertical extension and is worn by those not affiliated with any particular sect.

In India the perpendicular Tilak distinguishes the adorer of the Preserver, from the worshipper of the Destroyer. Worshippers of Lord Vishnu, known as Vaishnavas, wear a vertical V or U shaped tilak known as Urdhavapundra, using ash (vibhuti), clay or sandalwood paste. This is a sign of preservation or protection. Worshippers of Lord Shiva, known as Saivites draw three horizontal stripes joining at corners (Tripundra) with vibhuti or sandalwood paste anda red dot between the eyebrows. This is as a reminder of God’s three-fold nature of creator, preserver, and destroyer.

Is personal expression acceptable in public

Many times I come across this in office..lift...cafeteria..theatre..malls. People are talking on phone and before disconnecting the phone..they will say things like "I love you" " I miss you" so on and so forth. How do we look at this scenario? Is it appropriate to say this publicly? Not loud but enough for  the person standing next to you to hear it.

I am unable to decide. On one hand it is personal between 2 people and it need not be made so explicit. I am sure the involved parties know their feelings for each other. On other hand, it is individual choice. You are saying this in your own space. Why should it bother anyone ? He or she is not disturbing you, then why would you want to think about it?

Will like to hear more thoughts on this...

Monday, 15 June 2015

I wish to have..

I wish to do few things that I have been thinking up for last few weeks/months...Let me see how many of it I really go on to do!

My immediate one would be to have a kitchen garden...how do I go about it? Of course internet is there :) I hope to come back to this topic with success...fingers crossed!!

Is it easier to handle issues when....

I have observed that one feels more at command or comparatively more confident to take decisions that does not impact them directly. If it did, the same person's thinking capacity is impacted at least by 25%! Yes, he/she gets more desperate to achieve closure if it effects them directly. But the decision making is at best when it does not impact you directly..

Sunday, 14 June 2015

Learnings

I had two incidences happening in last month that was lot of learning for me...1) Sanam having a fractured collar bone and 2) My parents stay with me.

So much excitement and happening, pulsating that I do not wish to write here all that happened. It will turn into a novel :) But incidences that happened, conversations I had and heard..there was so much realization.

Few quick things I wish to list...

1) Always keep a portable light or huge torch in your car
2) Keep rope to pull vehical in emergency
3) Have maximum utility numbers saved on mobile...you never know what can come handy!
4) You will know who is ur abso near and dear one in emergencies :)
5) Know that there are some people who may not front ending but quietly offering you support that you may otherwise miss
6) Train yourself on emergency like learn First Aid basics, learn to change a punctured tyre
7) Learn to know your car as you would know your family member

As for more...I will put in up coming posts...

SENORITAS is ONE YEAR OLD!!

This June, 6th June to be precise, Senoritas completed one year. It started with a concept of being in touch with wonderful ladies in my life whom I have met by destiny :)  And I am fortunate to have them at various stages of respective lives where I personally see so much opportunities to grow and learn.

I wish to meet them often, I wish to hear from them often...hope I will have them visiting this konso more often :)

Senorita.....off you go on another year long journey...Hip Hip Hurrraaayyyyy :)

Tuesday, 7 April 2015

Humbleness at its best!

This is about a person known or yet unknown to me personally. Kumar is a cab owner. Has few taxis that he gives for rental. He is the vendor of the company v work in. We normally use his services for Mumbai office or airport transfers. He is very prompt in his services and we have been interacting on phone with him for 2 yrs.
One day when we had booked the cab with him the scheduled driver was not available. So he himself came with the cab and drove us to Mumbai n back. He did not say a word about who he is. That he owns the agency. We assumed him to b one of the drivers. On one occasion when he came home to collect money...We realised that he was the owner. Very humbly he said...If my driver is on leave I take the customer myself. I fill in for duty. Hearing that I was so happy to know a professional like him.
But there is more in store. When recently we contacted him and his phone was not reachable..We got in touch with next in charge at this agency. He informed us that Kumar was on leave for a month as he was visiting his children.
His Son is double Ph.d in US and his daughter is also in US and is a doctor. He was in US for a month long vacation.
He sent an email from there saying he is away and that Dhananjya will b the touch point in his absence.
I m so impressed with the professional attitude and more over the humbleness.
Truly respect him!

Monday, 6 April 2015

Parent Child quotient

When does a child decide he needs privacy n independence of his own?
What should be parents stand...respect n accept the proposal? Or dictate saying till I find it fit. ..u will stick with us?

Old age n hopes

At times I feel the hopes an old person has is as fragile as them!
I had mentioned abt my father's 80th bday to this lady who is around 70-73 yrs. The other day she asked me how was the bday. I said it was nice n smiled. She asked..ull celebrated out or called all at home? She was eagerly looking at me waiting for the answer. I said Aunty it was at home and with us children only. We cudnt invite all as exams were on for most of the children in the family. Like a kid she said...oh yes..u can do it in vacation..isn't it? ☺
She seemed more excited. I said yes...We can. Then with broaden smile she asked...wat kind of cake ull got? There are unique cakes available now. Oh..He has diabetes is it?  Not allowed sweet ?
Now my curiosity was peaking n I was reading her face...With a smile I cudnt hold back. So I decided to tell her how the bday was..n like a small kid with bright smile she listened attentively.
I thought I will show her the special edition of newspaper we did for my father as his surprise bday gift.
And then my thought stopped. This lady may have been thinking of a small similar bday of her own arranged by her children. Not sure if they wud do it...but did she hoped for one?
Would me showing her the newspaper v made for my dad...put her into deep thought hoping her children shud do something similar for her? Wud it pain her than delight?
How fragile she seemed n more than that the hopes..thoughts..wishes she had?
Shud i be showing her the newspaper?

Celebrity syndrome

Before I pen my thoughts let me openly say that I m not smitten by any celebrity. I am not a crazy fan that blindly follows their fav celebrities. ..specially from films. So this post is NOT in favor of any celebrity in particular.
During the recent video controversy Deepika Padukone was accused on many fronts. Claims were made that she has done the vogue video for publicity stunt for her upcoming movie! Really???
That she is cheap for miming words written by some lyricist. That she is public figure and she cannot be talking of sex and women's choices. That as public person she has moral responsibilities and cannot do video where her hair are blowing n bra strap seen..and what not!
Let us pause. So a celebrity or public figures cannot say like this....and a commoner can?? If an ordinary person like you and me talk about sex ( read as gossip women issues) that is acceptable? Is celebrity not a woman? Is she not like any of us with opinions? Are her blood cells any different from ordinary standard people like us? They claim Celebrity influence generations itseems and you think common friends..books..colleges..offices..systems..culture don't influence youngsters? ?
Celebrity doing such video  is degraded and commoners like you and me using social media like FB, twitter, blogspot is elegant? Disgracing anyone is not graceful as per me.
Every individual has a choice..has an opinion. You like it...accept it. You don't like it..ignore and move on.
I like to take positives from things that I come across. From the vogue video I choose to rest this topic. It is MY CHOICE 😉

Choices people make

Choices people make say a lot about them. Others judge them for these choices. Seldom anyone gives a thought to understand the reasoning behind the choice. At times there is nothing more than the beliefs he/she holds. Some do take that effort to think why someone made that choice..but only to ridicule. He or she must have done that to benefit himself/herself.  They believe there must be some selfish motive...hidden agenda behind every choice a person makes. That speaks of an individual thinking capacity (or limitations I can say) more than anything else ☺
When some individuals choices do not impact your day to day life....or rather does not deal with you in anyway...why should one retaliate so much? What right do you exercise in condemning another human being?
The concept of "Live and Let Live" is diminishing under the so called democracy of freedom of speech!
Hope better sense prevail.

Saturday, 28 March 2015

To the top without much noise

Saina Nehwal claimed the top most position without much noise. That's the most graceful climb I feel! Today the world will take a note of this silent climb...wooww.
Not that she had not faced bad times in life...she must have sure had her ups n down...people ridiculed and she had her own failures. ..but today nothing matters.
Way to go...way to follow

Thursday, 26 March 2015

Two sides of coin

Is insecurity and competition two sides of the same coin?  Does one lead to other? They say anything in excess is not good and certainly if these are the sides than definitely not!
Trying to nail down exactly what is it that prompts one to compete? Is it insecurity alone or are there others like showdown?  Things like wanting to prove a point? When one does succeed in trying to show the other their equivalent standing. ..how are we to react to such people..circumstances and realities? 
Ignoring doesn't sound so simple..accepting also is not easy.

Sunday, 15 March 2015

I m busy

Actually I m wondering why do we say I m busy? Have we given the time to assess the truth when we say we are busy?
It's the easiest excuse we give ourselves n others. If we gave little time management dose to ourselves I m sure there are few seconds..minutes..hours available out there.
At times we get tired with the routine and prefer to laze around..can relate to that and it is fair enough. One can get exhausted n need some time doing nothing. But then why say busy when someone asks for your time? Say you font want to do what is being asked rather than saying I am busy...velach naahi milat and all those excuses..
We want to sound goody goody so we don't say No...We want others to know how much we are doing. ....so we are busy and end result really start believing we are busy!

Monday, 9 March 2015

Jealousy

Jealousy is just like any other feeling. Generally considered negative feeling. Every one has some or the other reason to b jealous of another. Some to a nascent stage...some very crude. How to handle these jealous vibes?  If you feel jealous of someone..at some stage or later there is a solution to fix it....ofcourse if you WANT to fix it. ☺ impact can be worked out.
The other kind is when you receive those vibes from other. How not to let that impact you? We know we can't control other's thinking. ..so we have to control our thoughts and not worry about what others think. How easy is that? Solution is to believe that you have earned it because you deserve it. You worked for it.
Further turmoil is when jealousy turns into competition. You just cannot do anything about people wanting to compete. Worst still when you can sense that the competition is not because one feels genuine...It is only to "show" I m "one up" if not same.
Not to loose urself in such chaos is the state of attainment! 
Perhaps breathing out may help ☺

Wednesday, 4 March 2015

Parting with machine...

Have you ever felt the pain seeing your car go away for good?  I have felt it the 2nd time. First was when my 6 yr old Lily  (Alto) went n today my 4.5 yr old Pari  ( Fiesta) went.
One may wonder if I m out of my head when I m referring abt this parting pain with cars. It's machine after all....! But to me..they have been an integral part of my life...my day to day commute. Have seen me happy..angry..upset..sad..All moods  sitting with the machine. I believe they sense their drivers...they have a response ability...
I m more connected to the car than  perhaps few distant relatives. I loved my car as an identity and hence we believe in naming them too. Her parlour visits were actually servicing visits. I wudnt like anyone else behind her wheel. I feel the pain if there is slightest hurt to her..
I have actually conversed with the car...in the car.
As I saw her go today...I kept looking at her till she was out of the gate..out of my sight. Tears rolled down at the thought that I may never b able to see her again. ..perhaps she will miss me too...
I hope she gets a loving family who will take good care of her....I'll miss you Pari

Tuesday, 17 February 2015

Connected through phone

I m so excited to download blogger app on phone!  Earlier i wud have to log through the laptop that meant being in specific place to operate through laptop. But this one I m typing on phone while I m in bed😊
You need not b technology slave but there is so much for you to learn n do..things just get better n better....We just need to adapt to it..

Saturday, 14 February 2015

Missed Resolution..

I remember making a resolution last year that I will be very punctual with my bills n receipts and appropriately update them for tax claims and benefits. I remember buying files and pocket folders so that I can sort my bills and keep them. Two months in to this year and time of the year when you should update all the bills and receipts in various portals for tax claims. And there....I dont have them :(
Wonder what happened to the resolution? Like many others, this one collapsed badly. Again I decide today that now on will keep papers in order so that coming financial year will be proper. Hope this is not another year on year failed trail!!!

Any wise suggestions here...anybody?

Thursday, 29 January 2015

How to react to this?

For every question, situation, statement, remark, if the other person has explanation that you know is not logical....what do you do? :)

Positive Negative exchange

Long time back I was part of a short-film. The story revolved around the characters of lead actor & actress. The male character was all negative, low on life..bored dejected fellow and is admitted for psychological treatment. He has a nurse attending him who is full of life, always smiling, bubbly lady. They have several exchanges of thoughts and conversation during which she transfers lot of positive thoughts into him. He starts to see life better and eventually clears all the tests. The day of his discharge he wishes to meet this nurse and he gets to know that she is dead...suicidal case.

The intent to mention the above story is in our life too, we come across people with positive and negatives vibe. Has it happened to you in reality that someone has actually got you thinking positive or someone has actually taken the positive charge from you and left you with negative emotions?

Sunday, 18 January 2015

Shawshank Redemption

Saw this movie the other day. It talks of having hope and faith when placed in hopeless situation. I feel it only works in script and movies. Is it really possible for a man to keep working at something for twenty years without letting a soul know what is going on in his mind? 

Bumper to Bumper driving

I am sure you see cars around you on a busy chaotic and traffic jammed roads trying to get into space next to you or ahead of you even if it means it is just an inch!! Wonder what mentality is that? Have you given that a thought? I mean trying to squeeze in meter by meter helps you get no much ahead. And specially if you are waiting for a turn and someone else inches in. Why do people don't realize that a minute of wait can resolve the chaos at traffic? Everyone seems to be in extreme hurry...I feel it is not the hurry..it is the attitude that I will not let anyone take over me!! There is whole lot of ego that does not allow you to let someone move in a bit and then you get going too.
I have deliberately and patiently waited making way for someone who has been wanting to get in queue. In such scenario I hear loads of horns behind me, signalling me why am I being stupid? It is like aap ke mahanta ke chakker mein hum kyu fase?
Anyways I have decided to be a good citizen and show some behavior of good Samaritan...hopefully few more heads may decide as well and hopefully it may help make bumper to bumper driving a little less stressful ride. 

When you are hurt...disappointed

What is your typical reaction like when you are hurt, or disappointed or angry at someone or yourself? Are you able to predict that?

For me, I go in a shell. I take a step back from the situation. I go silent and cold. Many a times this has helped resolved many issues. As most of the times what you need to resolve an issue is just little time. Sometimes I forget the issue very easily and sometimes it remains inside me for a while. Best part is I dont let it hurt me for long. I am thankful about my ability to get back with routine. And what makes me happy is, most of the times....maximum times....my facial expression will continue to remain calm and at peace although I may be boiling within.

Sometimes it just helps to sleep over the matter. Next day you wake up and realize that issue was so trivial. There were times when I felt the other way too :) and in that case the issue certainly deserves my cold vibe!

I would say 95% of the times people dont even realize I am upset about something. I have this immediate reaction to accommodate what other person has to say. Again this has its pro & con..but it has helped me more than harm.

Wednesday, 7 January 2015

India is really exercising !!

I am an On and Off into exercising Buff. Sometimes it is Yoga, sometimes it is Treadmill, Gym, Swimming etc etc. Haven't done anything with consistency. Last few months I have been going for walks a bit regularly. It has amazed me to see the amount of people who have become Health Conscious.  A pretty large amount of people walk in the mornings and an equally same amount walk in the evenings. What I found intruding was that people from all class have taken to building up their health - Initially it was among the uppercuts and then filtered to the middle class, but now you see even the not so well off males - females and youngsters doing some or the other kind of work out.
Is it because people have realised the benefits of working out - or is it become a prestige issue to say that "I am into Gymming?" I wonder.