Thursday, 31 July 2014

MY JOURNAL - 31

WELL..THIS ONE IS GOING TO BE MY LAST QUESTION IN THE JOURNAL SERIES. IT WAS INDEED PLEASURE COMING UP WITH THESE QUESTIONS AS IT WAS LEARNING FOR ME AS WELL..MOST OF THE QUESTIONS MADE ME THINK AND I AM HOPEFUL BY THE END OF THE YEAR, I WILL HAVE LOT MORE CLARITY ...THANKS TO THE JOURNAL :) 

HERE IS YOUR QUESTION:
Most of you might have heard this marathi saying" Jawai mulga hoto pan Sunn mulgi hot naahi aani saasu aai hot naahi" [Translate in English: Son-in-law can easily be accepted as son but daughter-in-law cannot be accepted easily as Daughter just the way mother-in-law cannot be like your own mother] 
WHAT IS YOUR TAKE ON THIS SAYING? DESCRIBE YOURSELF AS SUNN AND AS SAASU :)

6 comments:

  1. I don't think that we should try to establish a relation of aai and daughter in the relation of Sasu and sunn, because each relation is unique. Each relation can be blossomed beautifully. Though there are more tensions seen in Sasu Sunn relationships all around - they arise more out of Ego problems and either one trying to establish herself as one up. But I have seen extremely beautiful relations between Sasu and Sunn. But this does not happen one sided - the relation has to be worked on from both ends. There is nothing each one desires - but respect. If both of them respect the others feelings the going is very very smooth.
    It is absolutely not necessary for a sunn to be a daughter - she can be an extremely wonderful sunn in herself. If you take it right - your mother-in-law can be even more than your mother.

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  2. Bhabhi, agree with your Sasu to Mother correlation and also agree that daughter-in-law need not be treated like daughter..she can be wonderful daughter-in-law herself.
    Then why is it that in most cases...Jawai becomes like the most important, respected, and son of the house-hold? He gets all the special treatment (perhaps because he is a visitor) but Sunn does not get that (even if she is visiting).
    I agree that it is about the respect, and generally speaking does every daughter in law get the same respect as son-in-law gets??? So basically are we coming down to Man v/s Woman respect quotient?
    In majority of households, this old tradition still continues....and hence my next question is describe you as Bahu and how you think you will be as Saasu :)

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  3. As for me being Sunn....I feel my role is limited as I have not had much to offer being away. Wherever applicable and as per customary, guess I have done my bit, perhaps I can do more. Staying away has a different impact than staying together. I try and give my 100% every time I can -
    As Saasu - I think I will be non-interfering MIL :) Unless asked for, will not probe :) Also I would like to avoid comparisons between my time and their time. I hope I turn out to be this "happy go lucky" MIL...who is there when needed and is as neutral as possible :)

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    Replies
    1. Dear, Dear- sorry to point out, but u need to have a son first to become a sasu,
      So when is the good news?

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  4. This Jamai being more respected and stuff comes as ours is a patriarchal society but slowly it is changing . As Bhabi rightly said every relation has its own beauty. And it should be just that . I am happy to be a Sunn at the ghar and dhuv at my mom s place .And I believe any relationships with anybody cannot be designed they have to just grow with time. As far as being a sassu .... thats a long long away I do not want to even think about it.

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  5. Yes, very true Madhavi, the Jamai raja is more pampered than the sunn. But at the same time are we not equally pampered as daughters when we go home ? Cannt have pampering everywhere.

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